The blanket: a work of love in wool

Dear Kath,

Today Bram said thank you for that lovely blanket you made for him as a gift before he was born. He said thank you because, for the first time, he really appreciated what he had been given.

It happened like this: I wandered into my eldest son's room this evening to continue a desultry conversation before he settled down. I saw his crocheted blanket on the floor and picked it up. I said convesationally: "Did you know that this blanket is handmade". "Really?" He asked surprised. "Yes" I said. "It was hand crocheted for you by a lady called Kath." I threw it onto the bed. He took it and with shining eyes began to wrap himself in it, looking at it this way and thatwith curiosity and pleasuer as if he had just unwrapped it for the first time - which I suppose in a way he had. "Yes, but how did she do itThese stitches!? It is so big, so very big. It must be very difficult. "

I laughed. "The stitching isn't difficult, but it would have taken a long time to do. But she wanted to do it. She made it even before you were born and came up on the train to give it to us, for you.

He was suggled right inside it now. "Who's Kath?" he asked.

"When me and Dad were so young," I said, "And just married, and did not have much, and were struggling to make our way in the world living in Sheffield, Kath and Ben took us under their wing and were our friends. They were the same age as Granny and Grandpa are now I reckon. But they were fun and we had some good times. Ben made wine . . . " and I stopped as I remembered us drinking so much of it that we could not walk home!

Is that where Dad got the idea of making home made wine himself?" asked Bram pulling me back into the present.
"Yes! I guess it was influential." I laughed again, remembering.

And that was it. I left a boy contented and secure snuggled in a bundle of memories. And for the first time he really appreciated his blanket for what it is: a work of love from a good friend he does not know and has not met. He understood the value of it and was so pleased. What was just a blanket has become a treasure, a web of love to keep out the cold and the loneliness - and I could see that he had 'got it'. I wanted to to tell you becuase more than any thing that is the best thanks you could get from my lovely young son. And it is the thanks I want to share.

And one day,, I too will make a blanket to wrap a young child up with love.

Snowed in

5th December 2008

War weary and battle torn I needed a break and today I got one: We were snowed in. So there was no school, no school run and no office.

We could sit in bed for 2 hours and still be in work for 9am. We had extra 2 hours in the day as we did not have to collect or take kids to school. The children played in the snow (as the primary school children are not allowed to do!) And there were mishaps and tears sometimes but lots of fun as well.

We made Christmas decorations in the afternoon. And we made a fire and kept it running all day so no extra heating. And I crocheted for a couple of hours after answering emails and such. And I got some things done: ordering presents from LLanraeader Post Office, booking February half term break, sorting the invites for the Christmas party, organised some basic stuff for the Christmas service I am doing a week on Sunday, all things I would have not got done otherwise.

Finally in the evening after disappointment at turning up to yoga and there being none I had a cuppa with the friend I had gone with and came home to David. Then I said “Lets go out for a walk in the snow – it is cold and still and clear and fresh.” So we shouted up to Hannah, and went, just half and hour around the block. There were no lovely views, too many lights for the stars, but beautiful, beautiful, nevertheless; with our boots crunching in the snow, the feeling of good strong walking through 6-8 inches in places. Not talking too much – companionability.

And so quiet, peaceful, and thankful for this gift of rest at this time of year I write my blog before retiring to bed. Thankyou God. Ruth

Photo Madness

Today against all our best instincts and breaking a personal rule never to accede to invitations to ‘free’ photo shoots that precipitate an invitation to part with large wodges of cash to actually own the images produced – yes we went on a free photo shoot at Arts Photography somewhere on the far side of Leeds from us (at least it felt it with five children and a birthing pool to transport there!

I went with apprehensive optimism, David setoff downright opposed to such a mad venture, children like a pack of rats in a sack. David had forgotton about the pool so we had to ‘pick it up on the way’, we were stuck in traffic, the ‘Tom Tom’ directed us to a back passage between two shops, before we tumbled out of our cars and decended on the unwary agency.

Thankfully we found them human and humane – children were giddy but Gemma calm and lively at once coxed and directed our chimps into cute and cheery poses in and out of the pool. Horrendous hype had been our past experience and we were relieved. Nevertheless tension was high (even with supply of excellent tea in stylish cups) for me until we tumbled forth from the studio with none of Gemmas’s equipment damaged, and no child psychologically scarred for life.

Arranged a viewing for a month’s time when I have recovered the nerve.

How dare they get away with it

It is the wee small hours and I have just read the Telegraph and Argos to find they have not published my letter and I am really fed up. How dare the NHS Trust after cutting midwifery care to the bone, then say that a computer programme is going to enable midwves to spend more time with Mums. More midwives will enable midwives to spend more time with Mums, one mother one midwife care will enable midwves to spend more time with mums. Computer programmes generally won't provide what women need and want which is human beings who listen and care!

But who is going to lsiten? It is women's things isn't it? It is a niche. Forget the fact that everyone is born of a woman, forget that most women have to go through a birthing, forget that most fathers now attend the birth. The general public won't be interested. I don't know tha tthey will but they should be because we all ahve mothers and daughters, sisters and aunts and unless someone challenges the NHS when it oversteps the mark we will lose our choices and our human care.

I need to make cake. I need something to do which is creative and beautiful instead of the fickle. And now I think I also need ot sleep!

Ruth

Leopard Bras and Silence

Whew! What a week or three we have had. So posted nothing.

I have had fever for three days (went to the Christmas crib service in my pyjamas covered by my coat!), Christmas was one long round of relatives. The bliss of New Years Day doing nothing seeing no one. And then 2nd January faced with our office in a cupboard, no phone, no broadband, all the office move to finish and customers to serve.

On Thursday this week I bought 18 bras, agreed a price for another business and signed a three year contract for a telephone service. On Friday I was offered a directorship on a social enterprise, we chose a school for my son, and chatted on Radio Leeds.

But I am still here and I have baked cakes - for sanity, creativity and taste! Grasmere ginger bread, and apple cake (which was delicious with cream) and I altered an old recipe to make the most delicious ginger biscuits I have made yet. I thought they were anyhow - and 4 trays of them disappeared pretty quick.

Tonight I went to a party. The party was birthday honours for a friend - we met when I was University Chaplain and she was Women's Officer. How the world moves on! My 5 children and her three. Our stories of birth and loss. It was a good evening - quiet, gentle and affectionate.

So here I am in the early hours able to contemplate a blog, uninterrupted and unburdened.

So thankyou
for challenge and excitement and possibility
Thankyou for cashflows and budgets and strategic planning.
Thankyou for Radio Leeds, for leopard pattened bras and birthing baths.

And thankyou for home, for family
For glasses of wine, good food and friendship
Thankyou for conversation and story telling
Thankyou for the night's silence
Thankyou for peace
And time to enjoy it.
Thankyou

Leopard Bras and Silence

Whew! What a week or three we have had. So posted nothing.

I have had fever for three days (went to the Christmas crib service in my pyjamas covered by my coat!), Christmas was one long round of relatives. The bliss of New Years Day doing nothing seeing no one. And then 2nd January faced with our office in a cupboard, no phone, no broadband, all the office move to finish and customers to serve.

On Thursday this week I bought 18 bras, agreed a price for another business and signed a three year contract for a telephone service. On Friday I was offered a directorship on a social enterprise, we chose a school for my son, and chatted on Radio Leeds.

But I am still here and I have baked cakes - for sanity, creativity and taste! Grasmere ginger bread, and apple cake (which was delicious with cream) and I altered an old recipe to make the most delicious ginger biscuits I have made yet. I thought they were anyhow - and 4 trays of them disappeared pretty quick.

Tonight I went to a party. The party was birthday honours for a friend - we met when I was University Chaplain and she was Women's Officer. How the world moves on! My 5 children and her three. Our stories of birth and loss. It was a good evening - quiet, gentle and affectionate.

So here I am in the early hours able to contemplate a blog, uninterrupted and unburdened.

So thankyou
for challenge and excitement and possibility
Thankyou for cashflows and budgets and strategic planning.
Thankyou for Radio Leeds, for leopard pattened bras and birthing baths.

And thankyou for home, for family
For glasses of wine, good food and friendship
Thankyou for conversation and story telling
Thankyou for the night's silence
Thankyou for peace
And time to enjoy it.
Thankyou

A cup of tea at the end of the day

Thankyou
for excitement and trepidation
for plans made and successfully excuted
for boxes of toys and a gleeful boy
for the cup of tea at the end of the day
which never tasted so good.

No pressure today
Just a deal to buy another company to close
And an office to move.

David reminded of the sideboard incident in the first year of our marriage, did pretty well. I went to deliver a card and view our new offices to be out of the way.

The sideboard incident for those who do not remember was David accepting the first price of a lovely utility sideboard in a bargain furniture shop. The man thought my indignant reaction to David's niavite so amusing he knocked the price down anyway. This time there is rather more money at stake.

I was at the new office bright an early. "You do know I am coming? Can you show me the sapce we will occupy later today? Can you show me the closest entrances to this room? Where is the nearest lift? I wanted to see it all. Then later - just to be sure - I walked David around the place. So when, later, the caretaker was not to be found, there was no problem. With a key and a swipe card we could get on with it. With a man and a van we had the job done in under 2 hours. That did not of course count the 3 hours packing before hand. And the many hours tomorrow unpacking and sorting . But it is good to prepare and plan and see it all work.

And we collected all the children from various childcare places, and oh how good the tea tasted!
No cake made but ate the rest of the bread and mulled fruit juice pudding I made yesterday.